How To Set Emotional Boundaries In Relationships

Welcome to It Stops With Me Podcast, the show that talks about challenging relationships and self-love topics. I'm your host, Amy-Lee Farr, and today we're going to talk about Self-Love with boundaries.

Our second season begins today! Our 8 part series on Building Better Boundaries, adapted from The Self Help Alliance.

I'll discuss the ins and outs of ineffective and poor boundaries in intimate relationships and offer listeners a special surprise at the end; be sure to listen all the way through for the details!"

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A course adapted from The Self Help Alliance

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FEELINGS LOG INSTRUCTIONS

1. On a daily basis for the next thirty days, record feelings you are experiencing. Separate your daily journal into different parts of your day. You may want to make a template and photocopy it.

For example;

• Morning-rising and breakfast
• Morning-at work (school, home, volunteer)
• Afternoon-lunch
• Afternoon-back at a job (school, home, volunteer)
• The early evening-on way home
• Evening-dinner
• Later evening Pre-going to bed

2. For each part of the day, identify the following: What I was feeling? What thought or stimulus brought on that feeling? What, if anything, did I do as a result of this feeling? How did others react to my behaviour?

To help you identify the feelings experienced, use the list of feeling words below, and add to it if you choose.

You can also use these words to try to identify how others around you might be feeling:

Abandoned, absorbed, abused, aching, admired, affection, afflicted, agonized, agreeable, alien, alienated, altruistic, amiable, anguished, belittled, benevolent, benign, big-hearted, brotherly, bullied, caring, charitable, comforting, compassionate, concern, congenial, conscientious, considerate, cooperative, cordial, depressed, despised, despondent, diminished, disliked, displeased, dissatisfied, doubtful, embarrassed, flimsy, fuming, honest, horrible, humiliated, impatient, imprisoned, injured, interest, irritated, love, pathetic, pitiful, ridiculed, sad, shaky, shocked, sceptical, speechless, strained, worrying.

3. Repeat. If after 30 days of keeping a "Feelings Log'' you do not feel confident with your feelings or if you feel you would like to explore your feelings more, return to Step 1 and begin again.

Wanting to improve further and attempt a task again is never a sign of failure, only of determination.